Great piece here. Oddly enough though I was a Catholic school kid and an altar boy (no girls allowed in our day!) I never really thought being gay was sinful. It was more that, having been born in 1954 and growing up in Deepest Suburbia being gay was just So not an option. As late as high school the only gay people in the world I knew of were Truman Capote, Liberace and Elton John and as I wasn't the flamboyant type (I really did like baseball and rock and roll, it was my hopelessly hetero brother who was the Drama Club kid who liked show tunes) I figured I must be "normal". Never mind the dreams I tried to ignore or that cute boy I couldn't stop thinking about who in true soap opera fashion was my girlfriend's cousin.
How wonderful to both read and listen to this piece, especially this: time and certainty are enemies. That time never loses. That hits home. Hope your mom continues to improve. <3
This piece brings up so much, Bryon. Growing up Catholic (I've been recovered for a while now. Being in high school at a time when it was almost OK for gay friends to be out, but not quite, and looking back years later and having it be so obvious--the guys who were so nice, so easy to be around...Going to a women's college at a time when it was definitely safe for lesbians to be out living in a community of straight and lesbian women for four years...Getting married and my family trying to figure out if our gay cousins should have one room or two... (head shaking here). To this day, I can't imagine how hard it must be to live without being your true self. We all hide parts of ourselves from time to time, but to have to systematically hide...I just can't fathom it. My heart breaks.
Truly wild. Truly tragic! I think younger generations are more open minded and progressive. That’s my hope. It’s so much better for all to choose love!!!!
I have a lot of hope, Byron, just from watching my teenager. He has such a different perspective than I and my peers did--in all the best ways. Love, all the way. We need it!
Powerful piece on certainty as temporary scaffolding that collapses under lived experience. The part about confidence passing for truth really landed bc that's the exact mechanism that keeps rigid belief systems functioning until they don't. I've watched similar patterns play out around different identities where time consistently erodes the certainty people weaponize against themselves or others.
Great piece here. Oddly enough though I was a Catholic school kid and an altar boy (no girls allowed in our day!) I never really thought being gay was sinful. It was more that, having been born in 1954 and growing up in Deepest Suburbia being gay was just So not an option. As late as high school the only gay people in the world I knew of were Truman Capote, Liberace and Elton John and as I wasn't the flamboyant type (I really did like baseball and rock and roll, it was my hopelessly hetero brother who was the Drama Club kid who liked show tunes) I figured I must be "normal". Never mind the dreams I tried to ignore or that cute boy I couldn't stop thinking about who in true soap opera fashion was my girlfriend's cousin.
Hahaha hope you’re writing a book about all this!
Very similar experience only from the Baptist side and my aha came in ninth grade when I started going to public school and met the real world.
The “real world” often brings so much clarity!!
How wonderful to both read and listen to this piece, especially this: time and certainty are enemies. That time never loses. That hits home. Hope your mom continues to improve. <3
Thanks Cathy! She’s doing great and I’ve left Louisiana at last (again) ((for now)) ❤️🙏
This piece brings up so much, Bryon. Growing up Catholic (I've been recovered for a while now. Being in high school at a time when it was almost OK for gay friends to be out, but not quite, and looking back years later and having it be so obvious--the guys who were so nice, so easy to be around...Going to a women's college at a time when it was definitely safe for lesbians to be out living in a community of straight and lesbian women for four years...Getting married and my family trying to figure out if our gay cousins should have one room or two... (head shaking here). To this day, I can't imagine how hard it must be to live without being your true self. We all hide parts of ourselves from time to time, but to have to systematically hide...I just can't fathom it. My heart breaks.
Truly wild. Truly tragic! I think younger generations are more open minded and progressive. That’s my hope. It’s so much better for all to choose love!!!!
I have a lot of hope, Byron, just from watching my teenager. He has such a different perspective than I and my peers did--in all the best ways. Love, all the way. We need it!
Powerful piece on certainty as temporary scaffolding that collapses under lived experience. The part about confidence passing for truth really landed bc that's the exact mechanism that keeps rigid belief systems functioning until they don't. I've watched similar patterns play out around different identities where time consistently erodes the certainty people weaponize against themselves or others.
Thanks for the comment! The world, the world. Alas